Siddin Around

Plastic Drug Children

By: Syd K Innanovia

So I’m sitting here talking to my kid’s dad about some shit and I suddenly remember I forgot to do this week’s comedy review. “I’m a comedian now. I have responsibilities.”
Whatever. It took me like a half hour to get YouTube to load because the system was down. Technology is such a cruel master.

The first video I saw caught my eye because it’s a new video by Calvin Harris, “This Is What You Came For”. His work has always intrigued me a bit. A guy I used to see a couple years ago introduced me to him. I will say most of the people I have been with have had impeccable taste in music.
I stopped this video halfway through at most. It just wasn’t getting any better, and I let it go longer than I should have. Jeesh. I have heard better DJing from him, and he’s worked with better singers…. There is really nothing of note to this song. It was so completely plastic I almost threw up.
I will say the outfits were obviously well paid for along with the set. I don’t hate Rihanna as a singer, but this was some of the worst shit I’ve ever seen.

Jacob Sartorius- Sweatshirt???
A kid in a classroom as the advertising picture. That always grabs your attention.
OH MY GOD.
SEND HELP.
PLEASE SEND HELP.
“You can wear my sweatshirt, and you can tell your friends-“
PLEASE STOP.
You should definitely go back to third grade science, kid. Nice effort.
Who paid for this guy to get famous? There is no fucking way he really gets laid. What would he even do with it? Is he what’s in right now? I need some 8 year old friends, apparently.
Basically the whole video is just this little kid walking around a school talking to his “girl” about how much he wants her to wear his sweatshirt.
It could be adorable on some level, I am sure. I bet tons of little girls and boys think he’s the best thing since sliced bread, probably have posters of him in their rooms already.
Scary thought… If this kid was more creative it would be worth it.

Okay, so I gotta find out who this Rae Sremmurd is. I’ve never heard of him either. The song is “Look Alive”.
Strange. People are doing the wrong drugs again, apparently.
What the fuck is this “Hype” drink they’re obviously sponsored by? Such shitty auto-tune, as well, I always hated auto-tune as it is but this is extra odd sounding. How on earth does it have this many views?
You should really watch this, ladies and gentlemen. It highly concerns me.
I’m more baffled the longer I listen to this and I just can’t stop. It’s really sad actually. I was really hoping for some good music to report on this week, but no, people love shit as usual.
Wake up, guys. This is atrocious.
Tune in next week for more lovely explanations of our current trends!

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s